Open RP Post

[rzhavyy]

 

Leave a starter post or ask for one, give me gifs and pretty pictures, song lyrics, a ship and a setting, or any mix you like.

Let's make magic happen. NSFW is cool, just label the subject line pls.

If you wanna know what I'm into, my preference are here.
I'm into just about anything with discussion, though.

Comments

[stevegrogers]

[ Normally, the elements wouldn't bother him either but he just left a very warm bed where Bucky could have been with him. They shared a bed plenty in their youth and Steve never really thought much about it being odd or anything to do it now.

He barely let Bucky out of his sight at all.

Moving closer, he slung an arm around Bucky's shoulders. ]

I could bring the blankets and pillows out here if you wanna trade off keeping watch.

[rzhavyy]

[It'd been hard at first, the way that Steve hardly seemed to want to leave him alone. There were a few harsh words, but he eventually settled. And Steve felt more like an anchor when his own mind tried to drown in the darkness.

He hears him shift closer, waits until the blonde's slinging an arm around his shoulders and it takes a few moments, but he does relax into the contact. He shakes his head, looks up at Steve with sharp blue eyes.]

Told you I'd be in soon- Punk.

[That insult-slash-endearment comes a little rusty, hesitant. Hasn't used it in so long it's strange on his tongue, and he watches Steve, like he's not sure the words in his memory are right.]

[stevegrogers]

[ It had been an adjustment for both of them and Steve learned quickly enough to not take some things personally and to let go some. Bucky wouldn't just disappear on him without a word or become suddenly hurt. Letting out a breath, he squeezed Bucky's shoulders. ]

You were too slow, Jerk and I can't sleep if you're not -- [ Nearby - but it felt pathetic to fully confess to, nearly a co-dependence type of thing but he'd deal with being apart more once they had time together first. He spent so many years believing Bucky was dead, after all. ]

But I can go back in if you want. I'm getting kinda hungry.

[rzhavyy]

[Jerk. He hadn't quite known what the reply was, but it feels right when it comes off of Steve's mouth, and he nods in quiet acceptance. It feels familiar, something he's heard a million times and just couldn't quite find.

He also notes that admission that Steve cuts off. As if even out here, just between them, it's too much. He can understand that, and so he lets the words hang there, unfinished. He shakes his head at the offer.

He just needed the reassurance of security, seeing it with his own eyes. And yes, maybe the bit of quiet to himself. Steve helped smooth away the worst of those feelings like he didn't deserve some place safe, though. To be here with him.]

Why don't we both go.

[stevegrogers]

[ No matter what, Steve knew it would be a long and slow process for Bucky to feel more secure and longer still to feel safe. In all honesty, he rarely felt safe but tended to keep a greater lock on his own mess, very few knowing how he suffered. Captain America needed to be above such weaknesses anyway and he needed to keep to the carefully cultivated image.

Looking at Bucky right then, all the past pain felt entirely worth it. ]

Why don't I make you a grilled cheese? [ When it came down to cooking, Steve didn't have a lot of range but he could handle a few things.

Holding out his hand, he flashed a smile. ]

[rzhavyy]

That sounds good.

[By which he means that anything Steve puts together sounds good. Easing him into this, the idea of having somewhere to stay, somewhere with Steve. Where he didn't have to keep looking over his shoulder, even if Bucky couldn't scrub the paranoia from his body quite so easily.

But he was trying. And even if he didn't quite trust himself, he trusted Steve. So he took his hand, and it's maybe not quite a smile, but it's close, a whisper of affection in his blue eyes.]

[stevegrogers]

[ Squeezing Bucky's hand, he felt some of the tension leave his shoulders as he led them back inside and towards the kitchen. He knew how important the small steps were and giving Bucky simple choices to become accustomed to it again. The therapists gave him all kinds of tips but he only took some to heart.

Letting go of Bucky's hand, he moved around to grab the things he needed. ]

How about you pick the chips we eat. There's some in the cabinet.

Do you want meat on yours or strictly cheese?

[rzhavyy]

[There's a weight that he likes to Steve's hand against his. Like a reminder that Steve is here, something holding him to this moment, the present, not the things he's done or the ways their future could go sideways. And that's good enough.

He knows that Steve and Sam both think he should see a therapist, but he's just not ready. He knows that Steve's been talking to them instead, but he doesn't fight it. He knows that Steve's trying to help, and that matters. And if talking to people make him feel better about it, Bucky's more than willing to let him.]

I'll see what we've got.

[Bucky agrees evenly, looking through the cabinet and tugging down a bag of plain potato chips. They had more than a few varieties and Bucky could admit that the range of choice was nice. Being able to choose what he wanted; the fact that there was no punishment for his choices. The worst repercussions were that he might get a craving later. It made the idea of choice seem to strangle him less than it had at first, when he was still mostly lost in the dark.]

Just cheese.

[He removes the clip from the bag, stealing a few chips with his metal fingers while he watches Steve with sharp blue eyes.]

[stevegrogers]

[ Making the grilled cheese sandwiches felt normal and they didn't often find moments to settle into something typical and easy. Something everyday and domestic but they used to before the war when they only had each other against the world. In a way, it was still true and he knew if he reached out, Bucky would be there to grab for him, to hold on. It mattered and meant everything to him.

When the sandwiches were finished, he slid them onto two plates, putting them on the table. His fingers itched to brush up against Bucky but he refrained, not wanting to put took much focus onto his own issues. Instead, he sat down, waiting for Bucky to do the same. ]

One day, we'll be able to go anywhere we want. I'm sorry things have to be this way, Buck. I wish I could do more.